Saturday, June 27, 2009

Going Stir Crazy


I wish I was doing this right now

Before I left for Iraq I remember telling many family members and friends that I was quite sure I could "do anything for a year." I guess I was wrong. I should have said that I could do anything for a little over eleven months. This last month is killing me. All I can think about is getting home to Irene, Guinness and summer in Milwaukee. If I had six more months to go I don't think I would be all that bothered, but there is something about being so close to freedom that heightens the urgency. For the first eleven months the weeks seemed to fly by, now I'm pretty sure there are about ten extra hours in each day. Lately I have been thinking about how excruciating the last thirty days of a prisoner's sentence must be. When it is a large chunk of time it is easy to not think about the end date. Oh well, at least no one is trying to shank me in the laundry room.

Adding to my frustration was my recent viewing of the movie "The Hangover." If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it. Of course, now I want to go to Milwaukee and Las Vegas which is more than my brain can handle.










Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Have Gun Will Travel


This photo would be much more dramatic if I could say that I was taking aim at some insurgents, but I was only at the range re-qualifying on my Glock. I had my worst day at the range ever and have been downgraded from Expert to Sharpshooter. Fortunately, I have plenty of excuses. First of all, I only had forty-five rounds of ammunition to use before dipping into the "good (expensive) stuff." Qualifying requires forty rounds, so I only had five practice shots. Then there was the sweat which was running down my brow and into my eyes every two seconds. There was also quite a bit of dust blowing that morning which blurred my vision even further. I would estimate the temperature at about 120 Degrees which made the black gun a little hot in my hands, not to mention my palm sweaty. I am quite certain that when and if the occasion ever necessitates me shooting a terrorist, it will be under far more favorable conditions. I'm kidding of course, those are favorable conditions for Iraq.


As you can see from the countdown on the right-hand side of this page, time is getting short. I am happy to report that it appears that several projects are going to be completed before I get out of here. Once they are completed I will likely show some photos. My replacement should be here shortly which will help ensure a smooth transition upon departure.

Friday, June 12, 2009

It Has Been A While ...

I just returned from a month in DC and Wisconsin. I was at a conference in DC for ten days and then spent about three weeks in Wisconsin. Being home was great it reminded me of all the things I love about Milwaukee.

Anyway, I am back in Iraq after a rather flawless (compared to previous trips) series of plane and helicopter rides. Once again my best friend Ambien sent me into a smooth and deep sleep that made the thirteen hour flight seem like three. There was slight misunderstanding with the immigration people in Kuwait. I would tell you more, but I would hate to put anything in writing that could be used against me by the Kuwaiti government. Probably won't be stopping there again any time soon.

As you might expect, Iraq is like an oven and the smell of overcooked port-o-johns is once again in the air. It is tough to get back into the work because the two people who took care of things while I was gone both left for R&R before I returned. So I'm not exactly sure what happened for a month while I was gone. I only have about forty days left before I begin my final journey home, so a lot of what I will be doing is wrapping things up and preparing the way for my replacement.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Latest News


The usual crew visiting with some judges in Khan Bani Saad

This week we had an attack against members of our Provincial Reconstruction Team (PRT) as they visited a government building in Baqubah. As a result, two members of our team died and two more were injured along with eight U.S. Soldiers. It was a pretty devastating blow and certainly reminded most of us that even though things are improving, danger is always a suicide vest, rocket or car bomb away.

As for me, I have been trying to get a few projects up and running before I take my final R&R in May. When I return from R&R, I will have approximately seven weeks until I am out of here for good. Things have been crazy here lately. Since the election results were certified (many weeks late) there has been a lot of uncertainty in the provincial government. Additionally, they attempted to arrest three members-elect of the Provincial Council on the same day they were to be sworn into office.

I was in Baghdad last week. Everyone at the Embassy is wearing suits and ties and you barely know that you are in Iraq. Then I come down from the hinterlands in my 511 tactical pants, wrinkled polo shirt and muddy boots. Maybe it is just my imagination, but they seem to stare at me like the village idiot who just peed in the punchbowl. They usually ask where I am working and when I tell them "Diyala," they all give the same "yikes!!!!, better you than me" response. Truth be told I much prefer FOB Warhorse to the Embassy, despite the lack of creature comforts. Although, they did have $1 Schlitz beer night while I was at the Embassy. The bartender stood there stunned when I asked for one, I don't think Schlitz has a strong following amongst the diplomatic corp.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Still Here




I am still here, plugging away at projects which may I may never see completed but I am "moving the ball forward" as they say. I've had a few visitors here recently including my boss from DC. It is the first time I've met him, as he replaced the guy who hired me a few months ago. He's a really good guy and it was nice to get some time to talk to him.

The weather here is perfect. About 80 degrees and sunny every day. It makes being away from home a little easier since I see that it is still snowing occasionally in Milwaukee. The dust storms are kicking up more frequently, however, which means summer and blazing heat are just around the corner.

This week I am working on putting together text and designs for billboards which will inform the citizens of Diyala that they have rights under the Iraqi Constitution. We are also going to run some radio spots with the same purpose. I am also working on getting a literacy program going for the detainees in the local jails. If they are going to sit for one to two years waiting for trial, they might as well learn something.

I cannot believe that I only have four months left. It seems like only yesterday I was landing in Baghdad. Irene would probably disagree with that statement.

An enterprising local Iraqi has opened up a restaurant on the FOB. It is actually more of a food shack with some picnic tables. You can have overpriced lamb sausage, roasted tomatoes and bread, or overpriced flavored tobacco in a hookah pipe. As you can see, I went with the hookah. It wasn't bad. Not something I would do very often, but not bad.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

One Sad St. Patrick's Day




Wow. My first St. Patrick's Day without fun and merriment in about 16 years. I have to admit it is a little depressing thinking about all the festivities that will be taking place without me in a few short hours in Milwaukee. No Irish beer, no soda bread, no corned beef and cabbage, no Irish music and no hanging with my friends having a blast while a few dumb fools are at work. Damn.

Not to mention that today is also my beloved pooch Guinness' birthday. It will be the first year since we've been together that I won't be baking him his favorite "liver baby food" birthday cake with the yogurt icing. It is probably breaking his little heart. I always enjoy watching him take those first bites just before I headed out the door for a day of celebration. He still hasn't learned how to blow out the candles though.

The Nepalese guys at the DFAC have once again made their best efforts to capture the essence of a holiday they know nothing about. They splashed the place up with green streamers. Baked a cake with a shamrock on it, and made "Irish beef (not corned beef) and cabbage soup" (I didn't have the guts to try it yet). They also made a batch of green non-alcoholic beer. The only thing that depresses me more than not being home for St. Patrick's Day is the thought of drinking green non-alcoholic beer.

I hope everyone back home enjoys the day and raises a pint for me.

Happy St. Patrick's Day and Happy Birthday Guinness.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

London and Paris





Irene in front of the Eiffel Tower; me in the catacombs, the sign reads "Attention: this is the empire of death;" and both of us on the top of the double-decker in London.

I am back in Jordan after spending the last nine days in London and Paris with Irene. London was fantastic. We stayed in the financial district which was very centrally located. The hotel was right next door to St. Paul's Cathedral and extremely close to the Millennium Bridge and several other attractions. We walked all over the city and got a pretty good feel for it. We also purchased a bus tour pass for a day so that we could hop on and off at any of the tourist attractions. Irene and I were especially impressed with Westminster Abbey, coronation (and burial) place of the Kings and Queens of England. It was an impressive tour. I also enjoyed the British Museum which has amazing collections pilfered from all over the world.

The people in London were fantastic. Very nice and polite as was expected. The food was pretty standard "pub fare," but the selection of cask ales more than made up for the simple nature of the food.

After three days in London, Irene and I then took the Eurotrain through the "Chunnel" and arrived in Paris. Paris was unbelievably expensive. It was also quite a contrast with London. Whereas London was clean and well kept, Paris is covered with trash, graffiti, there is dog feces all over the sidewalks and Irene saw a guy peeing on a wall in broad daylight. The Metro (subway) in Paris was convenient, yet disgusting. Also, many of the Metro stations reeked of urine.

We stayed in two very nice hotels in Paris that were located extremely close to the Arc de Triomphe. Irene and I toured around Paris and saw all of the landmarks that are required on such a trip. The Louvre was good (though I preferred the British Museum) but as many before me have noted, it is too large to see more than a few rooms in a day. The catacombs were very cool and it was one of my favorite tours of the vacation.

I guess the best thing going in Paris is the food. After getting completely screwed at an Indian restaurant the first night there (I especially enjoyed paying the equivalent of $20 for white rice to go with our small plates of curried chicken), we followed the advice in a guide book and had some pretty fantastic meals for a reasonable (by Paris standards) price.

My main complaint about Paris was the seemingly endless string of French bastards that took it upon themselves to screw me out of my Euros. Besides the aforementioned $20 white rice, there was the $15 Guinness, the $8 glasses of water and the $5 diet cokes (and that was a bargain price -- the hotel charged $10). Then there were the constant "mistakes" that occurred at the restaurants. On more than one occasion we were "accidently" charged for items we didn't order or for the more expensive prix fix menu when we had ordered ala carte. Now, mistakes do happen. However, when you hand the check back to the waiter and he doesn't even need an explanation before turning to "fix" the problem that is a pretty good sign that he is trying to screw you. There was also the cab driver that charged 6 Euro to go about four blocks even though the meter read less than 4 Euro. I'll spare you the details, but I think Irene was surprised at the speed with which I chased that (profanity omitted) French (profanity omitted) down the street after we exchanged words and he laughed in my face and asked me "what I was going to do about it?" If only he hadn't made that next light I might have seen how the filth of the Metro compared with the filth of a French jail.

So to wrap up, that's thumbs way up for London. Thumbs somewhat down for Paris. Most importantly, it was nice to spend time with Irene and, hopefully, she has the "Paris thing" out of her system and now we can focus on a return trip to Ireland.